Those Little Scamps

Worn out from a night of destruction

Look at those two innocents lying on their blanket. I say 'their' blanket because that is exactly what that is. I bought that for them and only they use it. 'Wilderness' doesn't exactly describe my style but I digress.

They look sweet, don't they? Well, they are NOT. Those two, Nigel and Jakey, can tear up more stuff in a night's time than I can clean up in a day's time. Honestly, Jake is sweet. He is just following Nigel's lead. Ever heard of the term 'copy cat'? Jakey is a copy cat.

Nigel is not sweet. Really, he is not. Do NOT misunderstand. I love him! Oh, yeah, I love him but he just is NOT sweet. We think he is a manx. He looks like a manx. He acts like a manx but I will let you in on a little something. When that boy bites, I wonder if he is not part bob cat. It hurts like a .....well, it hurts. Even though I love him, he does not love me. Really, he just does not. His emotion toward me more closely resembles hatred. He seems to have trust issues when it comes to humans. He distrusts them even me. I understand. It has never been a requirement of mine that something/someone love me in return. Hey, if I love something, it really doesn't matter to me how they feel back. That is something I learned early on in life. So, I am cool with Nigel not liking me.

Totally unrelated yet interesting, last night, I had a dream. My dad often comes to me in dreams. Quite odd considering I never really knew the man. If I sat down and thought about it, I could compile a list of every time I ever saw or spoke to him. He has been dead for 11 years now. Since that time, I have had many, many dreams about him. I find it so odd but intriguing how the mind works itself out.

In this dream, I met him in a clearing in a vast, tall forest. We met at night. The sky overhead was heavily sprinkled with starlight. 'My' bright and shining moon cast long shadows all around us. My dad says to me "I know 'our' Andrea is getting married this weekend. I saw that from heaven." I say "You are in heaven? hmm. I do not think you can call her 'ours'. You cannot even call me that. You didn't want me, remember?" Dad says "I love you now." I say "It is too late now. Your love cannot help me...now."  Dad says "I am helping and it is never too late. By the way, in heaven, in every tree there is an owl and a hawk." Then, I awoke.

Really? In heaven, do you suppose in every tree there is an owl and a hawk? I suppose there is if that if how God wants it to be.

Before the dreams float away...

Where is that director yelling “Cut!” when my scene needs re-shooting? Where is my editor?? Where is that rewind button on my life? I need it, say, along about now would be a good time. Oh yeah, there are no such concoctions. They are only my contrivances. Being only my inventions, they would never do anyway.

Have you ever seen the movie “Brainstorm” with Natalie Wood and Christopher Walken? If you have not seen it, the premise is that a scientist invents a machine that is able to record a person’s thoughts. One of the dying inventors captures her last thoughts before her death. Her thoughts are depicted as little memory holding bubbles that come in and out of focus.

Ever since first seeing that movie years ago, in my mind’s eye, I envision my memories as a large mass of colorful frothiness floating around in a sink full of dish water. Now that is not romantic imagery, is it? That is me! At certain times in my life, I stop and wonder “Is this making a memory bubble?” “Am I piling on the suds?” “Will I remember this at death?” 

In life’s finality, will there be time to remember anything? What will be significant enough that I will remember it in my last and most profound seconds? Which bubbles will float up to burst in on my concluding thoughts?

Often, I sit in darkness when the faint radiance of a certain bubble begins to illuminate my reasoning. I reveal it now only so you may zoom into it with me. I am sitting across from a teacher. We are discussing writing. I say “I will never be able to write what I dream. I will never possess adequate ability.” The teacher says “Free your dreams. You cannot fear standing naked in front of the world exposing your inner most thoughts.” But I argue “It is not that. I have no fear of exposure. I do not have the word power. I do not speak the language of my dreams. I have the desire but not the tools.” The teacher replies “You are the author of your dreams. Of course, you speak the language. You will find it.” Then, I think to myself as I turn to leave “Yeah and people in hell want ice water too.”

The clock’s hands are turning and not stopping. Shadows grow long. Daylight is waning. Yes, along about now would be a good time to find the words for my dreams. My dreams cannot die with me. I was born to dream and I want to share them before they fade. Dreams are beautiful yet fleeting things.

He's Bold and He's Back!

Remember my "Old Aunt Cindy" animal tale about skanky 'possum? Well, he is is back and he is bold. No longer lurking about under cover of darkness, he now makes his appearance in broad open daylight. Not being an opossum authority, I suppose they really are not nocturnal creatures after all as I had once thought. At least, Skanky is not.

Jakey alerted me to his presence on the premises by almost having a conniption. Jakey was practically bouncing from one window to another trying desperately to catch a better view of Skanky. Plus, these creatures do not seem to have the careful, gracefulness of a cat. They are blundering bulls in china closets. This guy was out there banging and clanking like a loose anchor on the side of gale tossed ship!
Look at him eyeballing some left overs. Yuuummmeee!

That looks tastey!

Unrelated to anything written previously, a thought occurred to me this morning as I sat gazing at this picture while drinking my morning coffee. Considering my intense and chronic case of anglophilia, shouldn't this be the Tower Clock rather than the Eiffel Tower? I cannot help it. The Eiffel Tower is a beautiful thing! I can creep out from inside of my "English box" from time to time, right? Or is that considered cheating on my love?

Hope I am not cheating on the Tower Clock!

Did you read the book?

Did you read the book, 11/22/63 by Stephen King? If you did, you know one of Lee Harvey Oswald's addresses was on Mercedes Avenue in Fort Worth, Texas. I was over that way yesterday and took the opportunity to drive by his old address to take these photos with my phone. I do not imagine the area looks too much differently than it did at that time. However, the house he lived in is no longer standing. The only ghost remaining is an empty lot. Yet, nearby are many houses from that era still existing and being well lived in 50 years later.

Many times, I pass by the cemetery where he is buried. Someday, I might stop and take a picture of his grave to post here. I am fascinated by historic events even sad ones such as this tradgedy was.



Mercedes Avenue





Houses from the era probably similar to his rental.

Vacant lot where his rental stood. Old "Monkey Wards"  warehouse to left in background with American flag on top.

Empty lot across the street from his empty lot someone turned into an orchard.

Reflections of a Crazy Cat Lady

I have no she art to post. I have no pinterest additions. I have no polyvore creations. I only have thoughts. Boy, do I ever have thoughts! That is my downfall, I suppose. Anyway, I got to wondering this morning as I was addressing some envelopes. Yes, occassionally, I still have to mail something but only rarely. My stamps are parched, cracked and yellowed. They somewhat crumbled as I pulled them from their book. Anyway, I got to wondering...does a person's handwriting change? I suppose it does because mine sure has over the years. My writing used to be uniform and right slanted. Now, it is far more curly, flamboyant and straight up and down. I am not sure what that means other than yes, a person's handwriting does change.

Secondly, I have not made any she art lately but I have been contemplating it. I have decided that I like my first two primitive creations more than the well thought out second two creations. Something about the first two are more me because they were spontaneous. So I do prefer Christy's method more than the Julie Nutting method. Then, of course, I will try to meld the two methods and see what develops.

Thirdly, I never refer to myself as a crazy cat lady but that is exactly what I am. I do not know if that is a flaw. Maybe it is. Maybe it isn't but whatever it is, I embrace it. I am what I am. Like me or don't; that is my motto. If I had a family crest, that is what would be blasted across it. "Like me or don't." Either way, I am cool with it. Speaking of family, that reminds me of a piece of advice that my mother gave me a long time ago. Now know this, my mother is flawed like me. We come from a people that are far from perfect. Still, my mom could occassionally really give great piece of advice. Once she told me "no one ever has so many friends that they can afford to lose even one". She was right but still we do lose them, don't we? That is the nature of life. It rolls like a river and we move on. We try,we fail, we move on.

Could be Jakey but hair is too long and no flame on nose.

This really could have been Henri as a tyke though!

We Had a Little Storm

Actually, a tornado went right over my house yesterday. I mean it went right.over.my.house. It did not dip down low enough to take the roof off or take it off the foundation. I was not there to witness it but my neighbor called me to tell me they were taking cover in the bathtub with their parrot. The wind tore up some trees in our yards but that is nothing. Just about a quarter mile from my house, houses were blown off their foundations, roofs torn off, fences gone. I was so, so very lucky. Plus, all of my ferals were accounted for and none were even harmed. One of my coworkers house was completely destroyed. She lives less than a mile from me. I worried about my cats being killed if my house blew away. When I got home, I discovered they had built a nest in one of the bathrooms inside a cabinet under about 20 towels. Now, that is smart, isn't it?

I can walk to this house from my house. Close call!

Okay, Okay, Stop with the Tears Already!

Okay, okay due to popular demand, I am keeping Nigel's Mom alive. Apparently, I have more readers than I ever imagined. Lots of lurkers but no commentators! Who would have thought anyone was interested in what I had to say? I mean, I know nothing about nothing. That at least qualifies me to run for elected office, right?

My friend, Sherrilou, might have a melt down if she cannot get her daily dose of Nigel and his brothers' shenanigans. She has her, Manny, whom I think I have even blogged about once or twice because he is just so darn cute and could be my Oliver's brother. Poor Sherrilou had a job interview the other day and had to park near a location where she could see where someone had run over a beautiful black cat. She called me asking what to do. I told her to shake it off and stay frosty, go for her interview. Afterwards, she and I would handle the situation. We cannot stand to see one's beauty be destroyed even in death. All life deserves respect. If God created it, it is a beautiful thing. Remember I said I wanted a love that gets down in the trenches and does the dirty work? That is the kind of love I have for the innocents of the world.

Somehow though, I have to do some 'cyphering' in order to figure out a way to successfully publish my polyvore and pinterest 'vignettes' here too without chopping off the sides of everything so things will be changing at the minimum.

This is for you, Manny!

Gambian Rat?



Source

Did you see where there is a problem with these rats in the Florida Keys? Supposedly, they are 'cat sized' which got me to thinking. (I hear you mumbling "Oh no!" under your breath.) Wonder what one of my boys would do if he encountered one of these giant rats? I think it would be something like the encounter of horror when the opossum tried and succeeded in eating their cat food. 'Possums look somewhat like rats, right? Then, there was that other confrontation with a miffed raccoon that threw a cat food dish at me because he found it empty. His anger was personally directed at me though and not at my boys since I was the one falling down on the job by not generously supplying all wildlife in the area with plated up food. Regardless of the reaction, I am hoping those rats do not travel this far west. While I respect and value all life, that does not mean I want to live in close proximity to it all. ;)

Random

Today, I was stopped at a long, red light and got a picture through my windshield of this office building/condominium modern flat iron building. I really love the architecture of it. I would love to live in a building like that one although it would be more than slightly out of my price range. Still, I can appreciate it, right?

Then, last night I was going home from a class that I attend on Tuesday nights when I spontaneously decided to locate this beautiful church that I always see from high atop the highest bridge on the freeway. It really is beautiful and very old plus quite large. I have worked within two miles of it for the past 25 years but this was the first time I have driven over to see it.

We Love the West!

Nothing to say, really. I just stumbled across this pix of Andrea with a redwood and it makes me want to be there. Okay, I will pack faster!

SheArt to Plug the Fireplace!

Cleaning out and packing is not the only activity I have been up to lately. I have been taking an online class over at The Scarlet Lime. Really, this craft "is me". I am not sure what took me so long to dive off into it but now that I have, I cannot stop. I am truly, madly, deeply addicted to it. Christy suggested the first SheArt girl we make should be one of ourselves. I did that but I have not attached the words to myself which is what really makes it SheArt. I took a picture of what I created but I must confess this picture does not do it justice. What I made is like at least 10 times better than this picture suggests. I am really proud of it which I must say is rare for me when it comes to making 'art'. Usually I do not create much to be proud of in that category. But this time, I am really proud of this and will not be embarrassed to hang it up in my house. I wish you could see really how pretty it is. I will take another picture of it after I get her words on her. Just the right words, of course. I love making these things!

Crummy picture of my beautiful art

I have been busy. I believe a person should keep themselves busy working on constructive and learning projects. Never stop learning. Never stop working. Always improve. There is always room for it.

On another completely different front, we had some drama yesterday. After coming home from the store, I walked into the den just to see Nigel take off into the fireplace and launch himself upward. He clung to something I couldn't see then vanished. Gone! I peered up into the fireplace and he had managed to push open the damper. He was climbing up the inside of the fireplace up toward the roof. As you can probably imagine, I was somewhat panic stricken. I could not imagine how I was going to retrieve that boy. He was heading toward daylight! I was yelling up that fireplace "NIGEL!!!NIGEL". The sound of my screams prodded him upward so I stopped yelling and just sat back on my heels perplexed and worried. Seconds passed seeming like hours then, I heard a couple of boom, booms followed by plunk! And there he was, Nigel lying in the bottom of the fireplace filthy yet completely unscathed albeit significantly adled. Suffice it to say, the fireplace hole is exceedingly, adequately plugged now.

Okay, so I Made a Poor Choice

Okay so NOT all of my mistakes are cool as I have claimed recently. In hindsight, it was probably a mistake to take the fireplace screen down until I had constructed the new one. View the evidence, please.

You must admit though that these little feet prints are cute though, right? Those belong to either Henri, Ollie or Nigel. They do not belong to this guy.

Look at my moon and stars! He shelters me with his heart. Isn't he cute? He has been so good since his surgery. He does not like the fireplace either. He looks at it like it is a big cavernous black bottomless pit. He will not approach it. Good boy, Jakester!

I Am a Pack Mule!

Guess what I will be doing more of this coming weekend?

Right! More packing! Here I am at Lowe's buying more packing materials. I bought 50 more boxes. That should keep me busy for the weekend. I am an organizing fiend! I will be dragging more stuff out to the curb while anxiously awaiting someone to stop and claim it for theirs. I am really getting into this packing thing. Of course, my garage is running out of room for storage because I really need room for two vehicles in there (according to my sister). I may need to rent off site storage. That might be next week's project. I still have lots of rooms to clean out though so I will continue to be busy for a very long time.

Your pack mule,



Brutally Cleaning

I signed up for an online crafting class not long ago, then, hardly ever even turned on my computer immediately after signing up for it. This year something happened to me. It is difficult to explain but it was almost tangible. At midnight on January 1, 2012 it seems like something shifted gears or maybe the universe slid sideways. I have felt differently ever since that day. Weird, I know. I had been on a cleaning and throwing away spree prior to that time but now I have ramped it up into high gear. I am cleaning out EVERYTHING! I don't want to craft anymore. I want a clean room instead. I don't want my office room anymore. I want a clean room instead. I don't want to play on my computer anymore...I want to clean instead. Does this sound strange? It is just a life change. People go through those. I have been thinking about renting a dumpster so I will not have far to go to chunk things. Maybe I am just getting ready to drive off into the sunset heading west with my boys. If my blog is never updated anymore after today, you will know that I threw out my computer!

Mister, More Concrete Please



My house is 34 years old and I suddenly felt as if it needed more concrete. Just sayin'. No really, in my old age, I am just paring down. I do not want any carpet or anything that holds dust. I wish I could get a concrete couch! Might be kind of uncomfortable but would be super easy to clean, right?

When Kismet Happens

Sometimes kismet happens and you perform a good deed without intending it. This is what I mean.

The other night, I was visiting my mom. A knock came on her door and in popped our 96 year old friend, Roberta. She said she wanted to stop by to see if I was there because she needed some help. Her eyesight has been failing her lately. She had handwashed a blouse, hung it out to dry on her balcony as it had been a breezey day and now she could not find the blouse anywhere. I went with her to her apartment to take a look. I looked all over that balcony. No shirt was to be found. Since it was night, therefore dark, I could not see very far off into the distance but I saw no evidence of the hanger it had been on or of the blouse.

I turned to her and said "You know, I fear your blouse has blown away." Roberta said to me "Do you think a dog found it and is running down the road with it now?" We both laughed and I said "We can only hope so if he is in need and that he will make a nice, warm bed out of it."

My New Friend!

I have a new friend! I just have some kind of uncanny ability to make friends. It is quite amazing. I can find a friend almost anywhere. Keep reading. You will understand.

If there is a cat within 500 miles, it seeks me out. I don't really understand it but I think my mother might understand it best. She says the same cats are around everyone. I am just able to see them better sort of like some people can see miracles better than others. Sort of like some people see angels better than others. (By the way, I have met several angels.) Your love for a thing just sort of subconciously turns on your radar. Sort of like how a bat sees a bug in the dark. That is me...batty!

Anyhow, this is my new friend. I met him while I was walking to my car one night. Since that time, he waits for me every evening. I bring him treats. Oh yeah, you can make loads of friends if you bring food. That is an important thing to know. See him?

He is very shy. I have to leave his treat before he really comes up close. He thinks I am some kind of evil trickster trying to capture him. Oh no. I just want to spread the love around. My private inn is closed to all future business but my love is not closed. It is wide open to any friend open enough to receive it.

These Shoes

I love this girl wearing these shoes. I loved her before I knew her. In fact, I loved her years before she was even born.


She is the closest thing to a daughter that I will ever have. I say that without knowing how it feels to have a daughter so I could be all wrong in that assessment. Do you think people should comment on what they have never experienced? I do not think they should yet I do it.

I do know this much. I definitely love her. Memories of her travel across my mind like a strange mix of iridescent bubbles floating across an empty sky.

Peculiar what things form a memory.

Seeing her running to my car after school on a day when I got to pick her up.

Peeking through the blinds at her trying to learn to ride a bicycle and cringing when she falls.

Watching her nonchalant, easy way yet completely effective slamming of a volleyball across the net.

Watching her standing bravely and self assuredly deliver a stand up routine in front of a rowdy crowd of strangers with me looking on like an overly zealous bouncer eager to toss out anyone that did not laugh.

Would you wear these shoes on your wedding day? I so would!

The Old Year is Gone Along with some Naivity

Saturday, December 31, 2011, I begin an early day. I take pictures so I will remember next year what kind of day it was. Do you often find yourself trying to remember the weather and the details of the last day of the year for the year before? Well, here it is for my memory book so to speak.

I am almost to my church where I will be setting up the alter for the next day's communion.

No surprise here. Due to the holidays, I am the only person within sight of anywhere. I like having the church all to myself. It looks small but it actually is quite large. In the picture is just the church and not the outlying connecting buildings.

Just inside the side door.

Heading to alter guild work room.

In the sacristy, getting ready to begin.

You must begin by getting your mind in the right place to begin your service. We take this very seriously. It is the Lord's table and we treat it as such.

I just want to look at this creche. It is beautiful. I should have put my hand beside it so the size of it could be made evident.

Advent candles in front of pulpit.

Beautiful magnolia wreaths.

I begin refilling the candles. There are many.

Taking time to admire this window. The dyes necessary to make this window are no longer mixed. Replacement pieces from Europe will never match again. These windows all tell stories and most every depiction in a window be it a ribbon, pearls, colors, vegetation, robes, whatever is an artistic symbol. You can study these windows for hours. They are amazing.

Refilling a candle and adjusting the wicks.

Refilling a communion candle and polishing the brass.

Obtaining the necessary, corporal, veil, towels, wafers, etc.

Beginning to dress the chalice.

Partially dressed chalice and priest's host.

Fully veiled chalice and host.

Preparing to pour the rabbinical wine.

Complete credence table with wine, ceborium, chalices and wafers.

Yesterday, New Year's Day, my mom shared an interesting and heart breaking story with me regarding the death of her father. She has shared many memories of her childhood with me through out our lives but this one was most poignant for me this time.  It was then that I realized, for one thing, that my desire to remove pain does not just only apply to cats. I hated to admit that my bleeding heart does not always bleed across to the human species. Sad, huh? That is not because I am a mean person. I am nice...sometimes. I mean I can be decent if  the sun and stars align just right. Mostly, I just figure humans are more capable of fixing their own problems and do not need my commiserations and assistance. Also, no one would ever look at my own life and say "Oh, yeah, I want her to give me advice because she has everything going on so perfectly!" Therefore, I focus on the innocent and helpless creatures. Yesterday was sort of what you would call a watershed moment for me. It was a realization. There is one area in which I would love to help all of us and that is dealing with sorrow. Sorrow is hard. It is heart wrenching. It is unfixable for some people. They will be broken all of their lives. A forever broken person living in a forever broken world. Wouldn't you love to 'fix' someone's heart? Especially someone you love so much like your mother? Wouldn't you love to take that pain away so that it never hurt again for them? If you could only do it for one person, even that would be so magnificent. My mother told me that she still remembers just as clearly as if it happened moments ago, her mother awakening her the morning of January 2, 1933 and telling her that her father had passed away in the night. She was 5 years old. My mom cried yesterday just like it happened only moments earlier. There are no words you can say to someone hurting that much and none you should say. My mom often tells me that I was born with a much greater faith than she has. I am not so certain about that. I thought about the words in the Bible about Heaven. We do not know much but we do know in Heaven that there are no father, brother, sister, mother or husband, wife. Jesus told us that. So I could hardly say to mom "oh, you will see your father again." She may but will she recognize him? Maybe not. I often think of the words that are not in the Bible. Just because it is not in there, does not mean He never said it. It only means that it was not recorded. He may have said exactly what happens, when and how. I don't know and no one else does but I do know this. He will make it all good. So you meet a being in Heaven and it was your earthly father yet you never know it. Will it matter? No. There will only be love and it will all be good. My understanding and knowledge is so small yet this much I know is true.